Site to Site to Site

A quick, initial comparison of online dating sites leads me to believe that all sites do not work for all people. I have three friends who have found husbands on eHarmony. THREE! And I have another friend who met his wife on Match.com. I know there are a lot of one night stand coming out of sites like craigslist and plentyoffish but that's not what I'm looking for. (I can find that on the dance floor at any bar on Beale Street.) So which site is going to work for me?

A portion of eHarmony's mission statement says "At eHarmony, our patented Compatibility Matching System® narrows the field from millions of candidates to a highly select group of singles that are compatible with you." In my first month on eHarmony, I was matched with over 100 men. I narrowed my settings so they were very specific. Against the suggestion of my friends, I even said that my partner's height was extremely important to me. yet I was still matched with over 100 men, in my area. I am thinking this compatibility system might be a little flawed when it comes to matching me. The OTHER thing I don't like about this site is your ability to cut off communication with a potential match by selecting OTHER as your reason. Is there a better way to give a girl a complex? Even worse? The reason that says "based on statements in their profile, I'm not interested..." Really? Thanks for passing judgment...

Match.com says "We go well beyond the obvious factors like age, interest and zipcode. You can even search by individual MatchWords to really zero in. Our member profiles give you great insight into the unique essence of our members so you can really get to know them before you get to meet them." So far, I've met a couple of guys. We haven't gone out yet but dates are in the works. Most guys seem to be looking for just about anything on Match.com and don't get very specific in their WANTS on their profiles. All I'm saying is if you don't want a big girl like me, you should SAY IT UP FRONT instead of waiting until it's too awkward or you're too chicken to 'fess up.

I am on cupid.com but I haven't really visited since I registered and I haven't gotten any notifications that anyone is interested. (Not surprised, honestly.) And, tonight, I will be giving CrazyBlindDate.com a look-see.

If you have suggestions for any other sites I should check out. Let me know. AdultFriendFinder is NOT an option people. I browsed. It was enjoyable for a moment. A fleeting, passing, moment.

Building the Online Profile

For the last few years, I have entered the online dating race but have never really gotten out of the gate. I usually fill out the profile, browse around, get frustrated by the contacts I get and quit before I have a date. But, since we are all embarking on this six months of dating and you all haven't really done your part (hint, hint), I have taken things into my own hands and posted my life resume once again.

I think it is critical to be honest in your profile and I am pretty blunt in mine. I want guys to know what they are getting. I post real, current pictures too.

Just in case you need something to show to ALL those guys you are fixing me up with... here's a glimpse of what I've posted on all those online dating sites:

If you have an appreciation for diversity, in your food, your friends, your music and your experiences...

If you are a die hard, tail-gating football fan, a baseball season ticket holder or you bleed blue...

If you love a good action film but can appreciate the finer points of a drama...

If you have a competitive spirit but a kind heart...

If you are confident but not arrogant... you may be the man for me.

Now... let's take it to another level and be honest about what we want ok?

If you are looking for a short, skinny blonde with a nice rack, I am NOT the girl you are looking for. I am 5'10" with a little more to love and I need a TALL man who can get his arms around me and help me meet my hug quota.

If you want someone who gets jealous when you flirt with her friends (because that's a sign that she really loves you), then I am NOT the girl for you. In the past people have told me that by NOT showing jealousy, it seems as if I don't care. I don't buy that. I want a guy that women love!

Lastly, if you are looking for a woman with no opinion who will agree with everything you say or do... well, then you are just silly. That woman doesn't exist. (And I am certainly not her!) I am not the argumentative type and I am not a big debator. But I enjoy banter now and then and I like to express my opinion through humor.

Now cast your nets people and bring in the big catch. Baseball season is over and I've got some free time!

Let's Begin!

We are about to embark on a journey together.

You, my friends and readers, and I are going to take a walk down a six month path toward the rest of my life. I understand if you are scared. So am I. But it's time I learn to trust the people I've allowed into my life. The ones who know me better than I think they do...

My biggest fear in life is ending up alone. Never finding a man with whom I can share my life... But until now, I've always felt like I had plenty of time to find him or to wait for him to find me. Now, six months before my 38th birthday, I no longer feel that way. And so, we begin...

What do I need from YOU? For the next six months, I am asking you to open your eyes and ears and, with keen awareness, help me find him. I want you to talk to strangers in the grocery line and get in touch with old friends and chat up the guy who comes to fix your air conditioner. And if you find someone that "looks" like me, fix me up! For the next six months, I will go out with anyone that YOU think I should date.

What am I going to to? I am going to heed the advice and recommendations of YOU. I am going to actively pursue opportunities that I have let pass me by in the past. I vow to find at least 5 dates on my own over the next 6 months as well. I will do my part. I promise.

Let's begin!

What are you looking for?

So what is it that you're looking for, Michele?

Many people have posed that question. They are curious why it is that I am 37 and single. And I am sure... They are just as shocked and amazed as I am that some decent guy hasn't snatched me up.

The truth is... I don't have a type. And I can't define my "ideal" man. Who he is, is not his hair or eye color or ethnic origin. Who he is, is not the tone of his skin or the size of his hat. Who he is, is not his height or weight or favorite baseball team. I guess all of those things matter. And maybe if I narrowed my choices down to all guys who are 6'2" with brown hair and green eyes, who love Italian food, Irish music and German beer that drive BMWs and carry man bags... It would be easier on all of us. Or harder. Depending on how you look at it.

But I have found in my life that when you narrow things down too much you live less and you learn less. And while life may feel a little safer or more comfortable... You miss out on so much.

If I had been so picky with my friends, I wouldn't know half of you. I love the diversity I find in you. The different foods we eat when we're together and the variety of activities we do. Man... how's this for an AHA moment right here "LIVE" on the blog? Maybe I can't figure out what I want because I am afraid of giving up the possibilities.

All I can say is this...

I like men. I like them all.

I like them ugly. I like them cute. I like them swimming with or without the suit.
I like them rich and I like them poor. I like them looking real good when they walk out the door.
I like them famous and I like them not. And I really like them hot.
I like them funny. I like them loud. I like them confident. I like them proud.
I like them silly and I like them smart. I like them equipped with a big heart.
I like them good with kids and good with cars. I like them from earth and even from mars.
I like men. I like them so much. That I can't narrow it down to such and such.
I like them thick and I like them thin. I like a strong jaw and a pointy chin.
I like them kind. I like them sweet. I like guys without a thing for feet.
I like them talented and willing to share. I like a guy not afraid to care.
I like them tall. And sometimes I like them short. I like them totally into sports.

I like men. I like them all.

I guess the answer to the question is... the possibilities are endless and I am looking to sort through them all until I find someone who fits. Like a good pair of black pants... They aren't easy to find. But once you pick through the racks and wear various styles and even sizes and you find a pair that works for you... You just know it. They feel right. And you want to wear them all the time.

One Step at a Time

ONE STEP AT A TIME ~by Jordin Sparks

Hurry up and wait
So close, but so far away
Everything that you've always dreamed of
Close enough for you to taste
But you just can't touch

You wanna show the world,
but no one knows your name yet
Wonder when and where and how you're gonna make it
You know you can if you get the chance
In your face seems the door keeps slamming
Now you're feeling more and more frustrated
And you're getting all kind of impatient waiting

We live and we learn to take
One step at a time
There's no need to rush
It's like learning to fly
Or falling in love
It's gonna happen and it's
Supposed to happen and we
Find the reasons why
One step at a time

You believe and you doubt
You're confused, and got it all figured out
Everything that you always wished for
Could be yours, should be yours, would be yours
If they only knew

When you can't wait any longer
But there's no end in sight
(When you need to find the strength)
It's the faith that makes you stronger
The only way we get there
Is one step at a time

Take one step at a time
There's no need to rush
It's like learning to fly
Or falling in love
It's gonna happen and it's
Supposed to happen that we
Find the reasons why